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2005-05-22 - 8:47 p.m.

We went to suuny It was good we went on the beach and on the arcades and went in loads of shops. I got loads of braclets, 1 with friends forever and one with truth. and 8 shag bands 4 black and 4 white. Tom got a friends forever one to it's pink. The bus didn't come till 12.20 so we were waiting 2 hours. Then about 2 hours on the way back. But that was my fault By 5 Tom wanted to go home I didn't. So i just sat there on the edge watching the tide go in. I was thinking bout what it would be like is i jumped over. I never would cause to many people would be sad. But i still thought about it then i thought about smuggies. And if your spose to give them to your nieces. And how i cant ask anyone cause it will start all over again. Then i thought about how weak i am cause im always scared of peole and crowds. And then you got Tom keep going on he wants to go when im trying to chill. I spose i took my anger out on him,which is really bad and something friends dont do to each other. I made a wish that ches would be happy then i sent him happy thoughts Tom said it works. Max stiil hasnt rung up. Im thinking bout doing Drama to maybe get ride of my fear of people. It's sad really be scared of people. Mums getting on my nerves shes trying to see what im typing but i cover up every time she walks past. its getting really frustrating. So im gonna go.


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